I vividly remember being about 20 weeks pregnant with my eldest son and sitting, talking to another equally pregnant first time mum friend of mine while tried to contort our swollen bodies into various yoga moves, we were also discussing birth. We were both scared shitless for lack of a better term and were discussing all the fears and horror stories we had heard..
“Did you read about ‘the ring of fire’?! Omg!”
“Did you hear whats-her-face had a 48hr labour?!”
“So & so’s labour was soo quick she never even got to the hospital!”
“How many stitches did she have?!?”
Fast forward about 15 weeks and we were sitting in the same yoga studio, our pregnant bodies increasingly more swollen and uncomfortable and the conversation had radically changed…
Now longer able to child’s pose without my belly touching the ground & my belly bubba thinking that was a sign to start tap dancing practise on my bladder, I turned to my friend and said, “I don’t even care how it happens anymore, I just want to get it out!”
This exact thought occurred to me about my big boys operation next week as every member of my household was awake at 330am this morning. Josh’s sleep has been increasingly more interrupted, his sleep apnoea has got worse. When he’s not waking up with a nightmare that someone is holding a pillow over his face (cause his airways block up and he can’t breathe) he is waking up dazed and confused, like a tiny drunk person half comotosed he asks me “is night-time? Can I have a story? Is it morning? I’m hungry”
Arghhhh, “no dude! It’s the middle of the night, we are sleeping now, no books. Your water bottle is next to you, ok?”
*cue epic meltdown with blood curdling screams, cue baby wakes up screaming also, cue dog wants to be let out because of all the screaming*
So between this sleepless 3 year old and an 8 month old baby who still has a boob in his mouth at least half the night and wakes up religiously at 6am sharp, I think I have had like 20 hours sleep in the last week!
Not only that but my precocious three year old who before Christmas was telling me about “eradicating the agapathis” with his Dad is suffering so badly from the glue ear that he can’t enunciate and repeats words over and over again because I can’t seem to understand him.
He is falling over as he walks and says he can’t balance, he’s had some really big falls, even for him, over the last week. Food has become an issue, he won’t eat much cause he says it’s hard to swallow. He says he’s nose is snotty and keeps trying to blow it but it’s just his adenoids blocking his airways.
And I realised we have all got to that point, “just get it out!!” all of it. Screw worrying about the surgery and recovery time. What will be will be.
We will plan for the worse and hopefully be pleasantly surprised. The hard two weeks or so we have ahead, just like child birth, will just be a small part of a much bigger and more beautiful story. Massive thanks to my “virtual village” of other mamas for sharing your stories with me and putting things into perspective!
Bring on next week.