Babywearing with Jess

“Accelerated Bonding” and Josh the velcro baby

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My first born, the beautiful, life changing little Velcro baby that he was, was my reason for discovering the “world of babywearing” in the first place because he just wouldn’t let me put him bloody down! Hahah

If it wasn’t for the fact he wouldn’t sleep anywhere but on me for the first almost eighteen months of his life until he got his first set of grommets then I would never have gone to a Slingbabies meet three and a half years ago to find something more than the uncomfortable “front pack” we bought when he was born.

The first sling meet I ever went to blew my mind… I didn’t even really realise there was many other options besides a “front pack” and the steel framed hiking backpack we were given by a kind friend (Thanks Kat x). All these slings and carriers and all these awe inspiring women who were wrapping and slinging and carrying their children in all different positions on their body with all these foreign looking things to me was literally mind blowing…

 

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Me and Josh at Slingbabies meet three years ago, I am literally scratching my head at the prospect of getting him onto my back in this wrap hahha ❤

 

There is a saying in the “babywearing world” about going down the rabbit hole… That was my rabbit hole. I borrowed a Kozy Carrier, I loved it, my world opened up. I didn’t have to sit in a rocking chair anymore for hours on end, I just strapped josh to me and did stuff while he watched or slept or feed…

But it was my Mum wearing it that was probably the one that was the most poignantly eye opening moments for me about what “babywearing” could do for families…

Josh hadn’t had much opportunity to bond with my Mum and as I said he was a Velcro baby. And I was an over protective first time mum. I hadn’t left him out of my sight, unless it was with James. To say I was overbearingly protective was probably an understatement. Mum lived (and still does) overseas and it was on a visit to see us when my Mum, her sister (my Aunty Donna) and I were all browsing in a shop down in the Viaduct in Auckland.

Josh was more than happy being on me in the Kozy but I needed to move my car as the parking had run out and he screamed bloody murder every-time I put him in the carseat… Mum said “Could you strap him to me and we can walk back and meet you there?”

And so I did. And I freaked out he would be screaming without me, he also had separation anxiety at the time too and I rushed and rushed to my car, moving my car, parking my car, almost running to the apartment entrance way… and I turned up to this…

 

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It is such a beautiful photo. I bought a Kozy Carrier as soon as I got home and only a few days into having my loan one from Slingbabies which is pictured above. I still have my Woodstock Kozy Carrier and wear both the boys in it… It is dear to my heart…

 

And I still make a habit of strapping my babies to my family members! We don’t live close to each other so when we are together this “accelerated bonding” that happens for both my babies but the person wearing them is so valuable for everyone I believe… And it gives me a break 😉

 

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(Pictures of my niece, Bella (7), my sister Kate and my cousin Cy wearing Jai in the Bitybean – Christmas 2015)

 

And to my beautiful second born, who really, really made me committed, not only to being a “babywearer”, but also in this idea and concept and actually doing something about my long brewing thoughts and opinions about “babywearing” among the mainstream and medical professionals perspectives..

Jai has been worn in a carrier since he was hours old… My first Ring Sling, Girasol Saltillo…

 

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This was the same day Jai was born, you can see the tears in my eyes, it makes me well up thinking about it… Being able to manage the same routine we did every night before Jai arrived and be there for my kid, while also feeling close to the baby I had already carried around with me for the nine months prior.. It was like a heart explosion moment…

 

Jai was worn every-day of his life until he was 8 months old, it was such a huge deal for me to go a whole day without wearing him at the time that I made a blog post about it (I didn’t babywear today… )…

Many parents will tell you about how even if they wore their first child, it wasn’t until they had their second that they had an even greater appreciation and love for their carriers! The opportunity to be hands free tending to your older child while also keeping your youngest happy is invaluable… (of course, I have blog posted about this too 😛 – Five reasons why I wear my baby ).

And then when Josh had his big operation and was in pain and recovery for like a month, it did indeed render him like a helpless newborn again as the ENT told us to expect… (there were lots of blogs about this one… That “just get it out” stageAn update on my big boys progress post opOn the home stretch… Almost! )

 

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And this process really, really gave all of us yet another level of appreciation for slings, wraps and carriers… I don’t know what we would have done as a family without that tool in our “parenting toolbox” and it inspired and drew me in more to the opportunities to use carriers to support big kids, not just babies and how many families maybe out there with a bigger kid going through trauma, grief, loss, other kinds of life changing and unsettling processes might be able to benefit from the use of slings and carriers, and also kids or families with special needs.

 

When Josh was screaming and trying to run away from the pain as his pain meds wore off and it was still another hour until we could give him more, the other thing that I felt I could do was to strap him to me, walk and cry together until he fell asleep…

My vision of spreading this concept more broadly really took hold…

 

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So what I want to know from you guys is stories of when babywearing has helped your family, especially if you have a story about how awesome it is for helping with “accelerated bonding”…

Feel free to comment here, share them on my Facebook page or if you would like to tell me a story anonymously, that’s also cool, send me an email babywearingwithjess@gmail.com

I would love to hear from you! 🙂

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